1 Math Class + Old Regrets = ?

As most of you know, I'm back in college and working on a degree in journalism. It's been an interesting and sometimes grueling adventure since I'm no longer a teenager and have bills of my own to pay. I've been enjoying the challenge, though and learning a lot about myself. It's amazing what you discover when you challenge yourself just a little. For years, while I was working and pursuing acting, I never had to apply myself to much beyond character studies and audition techniques. In the last year I've written papers on philosophy, sociological patterns at work, comparative essays on Frankenstein and Blade Runner ( that one was a blast) and an anthropological description of an American wedding (someitmes being a bridesmaid is useful). While I don't love missing outings with my friends so I can stay home and "work on a paper", I get a kick out of exercising my mental muscles a bit. It's down right addictive.

This semester I'm taking my first math class since high school. Back in high school I was the kind of student who did very well in anything that involved reading and writing. I had to work a lot harder at math and I actually ended up taking geometry twice because if you get a C they don't send you on to Algebra II. Needless to say I was a little worried that this college level math course might mess up my GPA. I've never had a 4.0 before and I don't intend to lose it now.

So, imagine my surprise when I got back my first test in Intermediate Algebra this week. I got an "A". A great big, fat "A". And I realized that this math thing is not so scary. I've been catching on pretty well in class, but I wasn't sure I really had it down until I got that test back. And I began to wonder where I might be today if I had realized this sooner. Say, back in the 6th grade. If I'm getting "A"s in math now and I got "C"s in math ten years ago, what does that mean? Did my brain suddenly learn how to manipulate algorithms while I was out of school? Am I smarter that I was ten years ago? Or am I just more confident? Maybe the amazingly patient and supportive teacher I have has a little bit to do with it too.

Last night in class our professor handed out the test again, put us in groups and had us work out the problems together. My group consisted of four young women and one guy. All the girls seemed to automatically defer to the guy in our group for help with the answers even though I had gotten a higher score than him on the test. Fine with me, I'm no teacher. But the thing that really irked me was how they all just assumed that they couldn't figure out the problems on their own. They had no confidence in themselves! It was just an automatic response to them. "Oh, well I'm no good at math so I'll ask this guy because guys are better at math than girls."
And these are smart, well spoken girls. Two of them are going into the nursing program and I know there's going to be more math and science for them master before they get out of there.

I was just so saddened to see how they all short changed themselves without even noticing they were doing it. And I was angry with myself for doing the same thing all these years. I used to want to be a marine biologist and study orca whales when I was a kid. By the time I got to high school I had given up on that idea. Too much math and science required for that. I thought I could never get through all the hard science classes to get a degree in marine biology. Now I'll never know.

If you have a little girl, please please encourage her in her math and science classes. It's not just the realm of super smart boys. We need more female doctors and scientists. We need more women getting masters degrees in engineering and computer science.

We need more female marine biologists.